So already I have been preparing for gotcha day(and the weeks to follow) to be the most intense day (and best) of my life and the more horrific day of H’s. It’ll start with some crazy, emotional, loud, white lady, speaking in some words that don’t make sense coming to take her away from everything she knows. Then take her to a hotel and strip her naked to give her a cold shower (only because there is no hot). If she has lice, shaving her head and if we make it through that mess it’ll be put her into trains, planes and automobiles while still touching her and talking that strange language. Then showing up in the tundra after leaving the rain forest to more crazy, loud, emotional white people. THEN taking her to the MD to get shots and shots and blood work and shots. Sounds like what every parent wants to do to their 4 year old child right? So I have been excited to send care packages after court because then at least she’ll have pictures and some tangible things to help her see what and who is coming.
Yesterday I found out that after court not only will I not be able to send her those packages but I will not get H’s measurements and height/weight before travel. My adoption agency also said that she didn’t know what or when they would tell her about me, if at all. WAIT, What? She is 4, I think it’s important that she be told. I am annoyed but don’t know at who, probably the mail service in Congo? Anyway…
I had a really rough day anyway and once I found this out I was just wrecked, I thought I’d need a drink, smoke, hot bath, punching bag, choc cake (whole), to scream and just run around and cry. Luckily I only needed some water and some deck time with some fabulous peeps. I also was reminded of how good my life truly is, full of family and friends and adventure and love. So good!
I am feeling better now but not because I think any of this makes any sense or is ideal but obviously because I have to. It is what it is and I guess my job on gotcha day just got a little harder, no biggy. I cannot wait to get this kiddo home!