I had hoped and prayed for 2012 to be a year of healing and health for those people who had suffered the year before. I remember thinking thank goodness 2011 is over and a new start for all. I remember fb posting exactly that. 2012 was not that year of healing and health for the people I loved. In fact I think there have been more disasters for everyone I know and in every area of their lives. I keep praying for the healing and good times, maybe it’s 2013 or maybe it’s not but I’ll keep praying anyway. I feel like I’ve seen more despair this year than ever before but the incredible thing is that I have also seen a whole lot of hope!!
This year has been chaos for me, crazy and boring all at the same time, unstable yet the most put together ever. I’ve been extremely excited and happy and extremely anxious and heartbroken. I have def been stretched farther than I’d ever imagined I could. I became single, quit smoking, worked 100+ hours a week, like 47 days on and 1 day off, saved every penny, got to know Jesus better, got to know who my true friends are, been moved and inspired by strangers, taken many leaps of faith. I have had to learn to be ok with letting go of the control. It’s been wild and I’m very much looking forward to the new year. There will still be pain and madness no doubt but I’m holding out hope that we’ll all be better. We’ll be more compassionate and giving, we’ll do more to ease the suffering and help carry the burden for our neighbors simply because they are our neighbors.
Well since the 12-21-12 end of the world thing didn’t go down like some thought it would, here I sit with no resolutions prepared for tonight. I don’t know what to do, I don’t want to go with my regular ole every year grow out nails, loose weight, get teeth bleached, wear deodorant daily, sell all earthly possessions and move to Uganda to build farms and sell tracker parts with K, get a husband, learn to breakdance, blah blah resolution list. Been there and not done those before. Hmmmmmmmmm, I’ve thought about resolving to never do any of the following dance moves in public again
But then I remembered that I love to bad dance with bad dancers. It really does bring me joy and I think it brings some joy to many others as well.
I was then thinking that I should resolve to balance my checkbook everyday, It would be super grown up and beneficial for me to just start keeping track. Then I remembered that I have resolved this with almost no success numerous other times. I also don’t have an available one, I’d have to order it from the bank and wouldn’t be able to start tomorrow, maybe next year.
I also thought that maybe resolving to shave my legs more would be a sweet treat for my next date. Or just the average passer by that glances down. Then I thought, well I don’t have a problem yet because they don’t look like these legs I found on google. Also I hate shaving.
So…still sitting here trying to come up with a great one that will challenge me to be a better person. Tricky tricky tricky. Happy New Year and be safe, hard to succeed or fail at any resolution if you’re not here for it. Get a DD.
P.S. I am going to be a mommy this year, for reals.